About Time

2 months and 24 days ago we came home from the hospital, two days prior to that my wife gave birth to our son Rory Heliuma Dullanty. So pretty much its been three months since I went through the "big  change" from guy to dad. Well guess what, not as much changes as you were lead to believe when you were a little kid. Ya I get up in the middle of the night to sometimes wipe poop from someone else's butt and now when I walk through city streets I think of how I would kill an attacker without endangering my baby. But all in all pretty much everything is the same. well lets be honest, the stuff that is the same is still the same but the things that are different are way way different.

First things first, back in my lone wolf days cock blocking was something that never really happened, firstly I was no Cassanova and also there is a certain level of respect among humans that just isn't shown in movies or on tv. i.e. none of my dude friends ever stole a dame from me, because well that never happens. But now I get cock blocked all the time!!!! There was a person years and years ago who told me a scary fact. "If you have two jars 1 labeled A and one labeled B, if you put a penny in jar A every time you have sex for the first year of your marriage. All sex pennies then go in jar B there after. The fact is you will never have as many pennies in jar B as you do in jar A." to which I declared "nuhhh uhhh!!!!" But her theory holds up and granted yes I am still only in my first year of marriage. No one ever told me that when you have a child there is a direct corrolation between when you try to get your swerve on and when they need to poop, cry, scream, snuggle, eat, and anything else that keeps you and your spouse from enjoying one another specially. I am literally convinced that the smell of soap upsets his stomach because every time malia gets out of the shower she immediately has spit up either down her cleavage or on the nape of her neck. The neck nape being my goto "hey ya wanna" hint I can genuinely say that there is something very dissatisfying about the smell of sour stomach milk being warn as a scent. In both our defenses you can't just wipe that stuff off, it soaks in instantaneously, especially to freshly washed skin. I hate to say it but there isn't anything sexy about spit up skin; and honestly thank God because that would be really disturbing.

On that note the Second major difference, I never shower anymore and neither does my wife. No I don't mean either of us are gross, but more often than not its probably been three days since my last shower. Between dinner, a three day attempt at finishing blogs like this, the occasional vaccume or load of dishes and guess what, the first thing to go is the showering. next comes the vacuuming. No matter what you think you can't do, with more coffee you can do anything. So when it finally comes down to it, you have to shower and when you finally get that chance you end up realizing that showering was awesome, its warm, it smells greats, did I mention that when you get out you can actually feel a lack of sweat grime on your skin. I realize that there has been a severe paradigm shift in my life when I am noticing a lack of grime instead of the other way around. Ive obviously spent my fair share of time not showering, either on a mission trip or just trying to flex my man muscles by seeing how long I could last without being disgusted but now its different, different because now Im not making the choice about whether I have time to take the shower of the will power to stay up the extra time to step into that shower knowing full well that when I get out there will be a baby who has just woken up from a lovely power nap and wants to play.

A baby always wants to play, sometimes they tell you this by cooing or making some other adorable noise that makes you happy with your parenthood decision, other times though the que to play is given with a blood curdling scream from a hammock placed just a foot or two from where you sleep at night. Not only does a baby always want to play but he always wants to play his way, buzzing your lips isn't always the right choice. Tummy scratches aren't always the right choice. sometimes playing is just holding and swaying from side to side all morning because he has a grumbly tummy. The real difference here is that I now feel stupid all the time. This counted as playing this morning but now its just cause for screaming and real tear crying. What was a funny face yesterday is the scary clown under your bed today. For the most part I would say I am pretty intuitive about people, not that I always heed my intuitions but now that this baby is here I've got nothing and that seems to be the nature of the beast. When you remove diction and communication you are left solely with trial and error when it comes to comforting.

This is my baby he came into this world at 6 pounds and 14 ounces, he loves long walks and is a big fan of women with dark hair. He is a flirt and will give just enough attention to lure you into smiling at him just before he buries his face into the neck of whoever is holding him keeping you on his hook of cuteness. He loves fart noises, he just found his fingers and loves to put them in his mouth to investigate. He can hold his head up, if he wants to but would really prefer it if you just held him close so he can nap on your shoulder. He farts and burps like a champ, if he pees in the tub its liable to go over your head and fall like rain if you don't deflect it in time. This is my son Rory and while there are things in my life that have stayed the same since his birth there are far more that have become incredibly different. My life will never be the same from one day to the next and while that will be a struggle from time to time I can't think of anything that makes me more excited.