My laberinth

Curently it is balls hot and I don't mean like its really hot, it's like holy crap why is it this hot anyywhere and why do people live here. If I was an original settler, I would have made it to my first summer and said, "family we are leaving its too hot for me." And we would have left and Chicago would not have been a city. Mind you it's 72^F and at least 100 % humidity so i am sure everyone else would love it. We are in Chicago, we are at METE which is missionary training. That's correct, you read what you thought, my wife, baby and I are at missionary training. Finally we are starting, when we are done we will celebrate the one year since we first applied to missions with the evangelical covenant church. today we did a lot of really not my favorite kinds of things, ok so I hated today. 

But let me explain that. I really want to be a missionary. And I relly want to go with the evangelical covenant church. So with that they have something's that they want us to do, they have this stuff called paper and the paper has these glyphs (regular words) and they expect you to read the words and do stuff with the paper. Some of the papers have to do with money, others have to do with logistics others are present purely as ice breakers. At this point it i just hard for me.

It is day two and I am still in my own personal hell. Today is worse there are people who are telling me things about myself who have never met me, they have never spoken to me. They do not know me.

They are trying to make conjectures about me and they are basing them on simple questionaires. they are trying to get me to blindly swallow doctorine, that I dont believe in. I in fact dissagree with the teaching of the doctorine they are telling me. 

There is an american proverb. it was probably stolen from somewhere else, and I will probably shorten it too much and I will probably miss quote it as well. There was a farmer, he wanted to farm corn his whole life, but he was unable to make a living doing so. he also hated to sow soy, he could however make a living planting soy. however he would have to plant his whole crop as soy. This lead to the farmer having make a choice every year, whether to plant corn, and not make any money or whether to plant soy and hate his job. When going to the see friends they would always ask, "Well how are you doing?" he would answer "Planting soy" or "Planting corn" 

I really want to be a missionary, I really really want to be a long term missionary abroad somewhere in the world for the rest of my life. I want to spread the gospel, and I want to work with people in realationship with them living a life more towards the one God wants us to live, working intergenerationally, cross culturally. That is my corn. 

But we cant plant corn all the time, and i am very painfully learning that over this week.